Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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