i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize