she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
