i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
