wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
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