Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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