i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
