i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
