we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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