Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
