i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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