I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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