So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
