is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
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the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
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Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
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