Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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