he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Randomize