why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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