Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I party with great urgency now.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
