I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
