well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
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Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
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At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize