So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
