My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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