He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
