got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize