sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
