You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
