Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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