Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
