Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize