That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
