he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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