I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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