I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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