found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
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