What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
