Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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