I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
You've changed since you got that strap on
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