Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
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I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
My breasts were aching with rage.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
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All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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