I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
