she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
