This house was built for laser tag.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I have aggressive nipples.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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