i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
