gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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