My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize