she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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