But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
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If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
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She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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