I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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