I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i already hear my dad disowning me
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
