pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize