I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Randomize